Readers: Comments Required. Seriously. You think I'm kidding.
If you're reading this, I would appreciate your comments like whoa. I've been chewing some stuff over in my mind for the next women's meeting later this month, and I want to check myself against the Word and other believers before diving into it fully. When I bounced these thoughts off my husband, he warned me to be a little bit careful with what I'm saying, but I don't know if his concern was based more in truth or more in worry over me and how my message will be received against women not in my position (i.e., stay-at-home moms). So let me bounce them off you fine folks too.
I was thinking a lot lately about the role of nurturing, specifically the role given to women to be nurturers. Not exclusively; I don't honestly believe that characteristics of either gender are exclusive, just more like trademarks. When I think of the role of Nurturer, I want to approach it in the most general sense, completely apart from the context of parenting. I think nurturing applies best in that context, but because of that, it has lost its significance in other areas of our lives (women). What I mean is, have we put that role secondary to other roles women have, saving it for when we become wives and mothers? I think we have. And then to take it one step further, we save our nurturing spirit exclusively for our families. There are few women who I know, and literally none who live apart from God, who are nurturers in being. The more I think about this, the less I believe nurturing is a gift, such as hospitality or evangelism is a gift given to believers. To nurture is a watermark of being a woman, just as protection is of a man.
So then, what does it mean to be nurturing? How do we apply that role to all aspects of our lives, in every relationship we cultivate? Who is God the Nurturer? Within the parental context, I think of a parent nurturing her child in the sense that she creates an atmosphere of safety, truth, and growth. In the Old Testament, God seems most parental when addressing Israel, calling His people His children, the land His daughter, and so forth. Not that He is that way exclusively. But when I think of God the Nurturer, I think of when He calls forth His children.
To nurture, I think, is to foster one's identity. As a mom, I nurture Max in the sense that I provide him with a sense of security, I give him the means and the space to become the child he is becoming, I offer guidance when needed, and I allow this to happen in an environment of godly wisdom and truth. Apart from being a mother, this definition of nurturing can be applied to all areas of a woman's life, within all relationships.
We as women can nurture our friendships, the people we work with, and on and on. We do this, I think, by creating an atmosphere that goes with us of truth. We bring with us a sense of security, that we will speak in truth and call forth truth in your life. We will nurture God's truth and God's calling in your life. We will foster your identity in Christ, affirm His work in you. We will allow the movement of the Spirit to comfort you. We will not allow untruth to fester, we will not tolerate deception.
All those things, I think is obvious, work only in perfect accordance with God and His will. We can't be those things all the time; we are still of the flesh. But the role of Nurturer, defined by God's own character, I think has been pushed aside, postponed. Maybe that's why many new mothers feel overwhelmed with the possibilities of growing their children. They haven't had the practice!
Ladies, what areas, other than in the parental context, can we fulfill this role as Nurturer that was divined to us as women? And men, how would it affect your life, apart from being a husband or father or son, if the women in your life accepted and practiced this role daily?
I was thinking a lot lately about the role of nurturing, specifically the role given to women to be nurturers. Not exclusively; I don't honestly believe that characteristics of either gender are exclusive, just more like trademarks. When I think of the role of Nurturer, I want to approach it in the most general sense, completely apart from the context of parenting. I think nurturing applies best in that context, but because of that, it has lost its significance in other areas of our lives (women). What I mean is, have we put that role secondary to other roles women have, saving it for when we become wives and mothers? I think we have. And then to take it one step further, we save our nurturing spirit exclusively for our families. There are few women who I know, and literally none who live apart from God, who are nurturers in being. The more I think about this, the less I believe nurturing is a gift, such as hospitality or evangelism is a gift given to believers. To nurture is a watermark of being a woman, just as protection is of a man.
So then, what does it mean to be nurturing? How do we apply that role to all aspects of our lives, in every relationship we cultivate? Who is God the Nurturer? Within the parental context, I think of a parent nurturing her child in the sense that she creates an atmosphere of safety, truth, and growth. In the Old Testament, God seems most parental when addressing Israel, calling His people His children, the land His daughter, and so forth. Not that He is that way exclusively. But when I think of God the Nurturer, I think of when He calls forth His children.
To nurture, I think, is to foster one's identity. As a mom, I nurture Max in the sense that I provide him with a sense of security, I give him the means and the space to become the child he is becoming, I offer guidance when needed, and I allow this to happen in an environment of godly wisdom and truth. Apart from being a mother, this definition of nurturing can be applied to all areas of a woman's life, within all relationships.
We as women can nurture our friendships, the people we work with, and on and on. We do this, I think, by creating an atmosphere that goes with us of truth. We bring with us a sense of security, that we will speak in truth and call forth truth in your life. We will nurture God's truth and God's calling in your life. We will foster your identity in Christ, affirm His work in you. We will allow the movement of the Spirit to comfort you. We will not allow untruth to fester, we will not tolerate deception.
All those things, I think is obvious, work only in perfect accordance with God and His will. We can't be those things all the time; we are still of the flesh. But the role of Nurturer, defined by God's own character, I think has been pushed aside, postponed. Maybe that's why many new mothers feel overwhelmed with the possibilities of growing their children. They haven't had the practice!
Ladies, what areas, other than in the parental context, can we fulfill this role as Nurturer that was divined to us as women? And men, how would it affect your life, apart from being a husband or father or son, if the women in your life accepted and practiced this role daily?
posted by Jessie | 9:57 AM
5 Comments:
OK Jess. Here's what I've got. I looked up the definition of nurture and here's what came up.
To nourish; feed.
To educate; train.
To help grow or develop; cultivate: nurture a student's talent.
I agree with you that God is innately nurturing and that women have an innate sense of nurturing that manifests itself in a different way than it does in men. I think that our culture and society has dictated that women are more nurturing than men, but I don't think that this is how God meant for our gender roles to function (for women to be solely responsible for nurturing their children). I think that both men and women should be dedicated, especially in bringing up children, to being nurturing. I think that each of us, as children of God, should be concerned with one another's growth and development (especially in the spiritual realm). This act of nurturing can present itself in very different ways depending on one's talents and spiritual gifts; some are gifted in teaching, some in encouragement, others in hospitality (each of these acts contributes to people's growth and development). To me, "to nurture" is a very broad concept that can be manifested in any number of ways. I guess what I would need to know is what your definition of nurture is in regards to the role of women.
I love you Jess. I so wish I could be there for your monthly ladies meeting. :)
i'm at work so i'll leave you a quick thouhgt...but i totally agree jessie...do not be weary of speaking this truth to your ladies. keep asking the Lord how he can nurture through you. when it is a revelation from within, and the Lord has spoken to you, about you, then sharing it to the other ladies will be way more meaningful and personal.
i find myself in a place of lots of cold people where i work. i love them, dont get me wrong. but i think i definitely have the capacity to nurture them. i am one of few here who gets on a personal level daily with my co-workers. i sincerely listen to them and remember to ask about what's going on at home. it's hard sometimes, as days get busier. but i think one of the main ways we nurture is investing time in others. the small things.
ps-i really do love my job and the people are great...i just find i myself being the encourager more often than being encouraged here.
I'm not a mother, I've never been in a serious relationship, and I'm not very religious. As such, my experience is only with my parents, my brother, and my friends. I think I'm nurturing of them. I tell them the truth when they need to hear it, I give them space when they need to figure something out for themselves, and I listen when they need to talk. I'm always genuinely interested in what they have to say and what I can do to help. I don't know if that helps you, but I don't think, as you said, that nurturing "has lost significance in other areas of our lives." I know it's something that's important to ME.
Good luck with your meeting. I think it's a great thing you're doing. :)
i'm with meredith. EVERYONE male or female needs a nurturer in his or her life. Father has a nurturing heart, so i would ask how does He nurture us? How does He meet our needs? and How can we allow Him to do this through us? I think it's so easy to forsake this role because it can be hard, draining, scary, you might get attached, someone might ask for more from you- but just remember as you jump in: HE is your source! He is the river of life that flows out of you. Don't forsake opportunities when you see someone in need whether it's taking time to hug or listen or feed :) As we offer our lives we see more and more that it's not about us, it's about Father and He is seen when we allow Him to live through us in the hard stuff. Then those around us see HIM and their lives our changed. We ARE the salt of the earth-the aroma of Christ- and THAT is the gospel I see in the nurturing heart of God. He meets our deepests needs for love, acceptance, worth, and security. And he provides opportunities for us to do that for others.
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